Piss and/or Vinegar
I've moved offices recently and, because of this, I'm now frequenting a different bathroom. The old bathroom was a company exclusive type of bathroom. The company I work for is the only tenant on that floor, so the urinals are kept "in the family." The new office is more of a communal bathroom that anyone can use–hitchhikers, neer do wells, lawyers, etc.
Anyway, I'm at stall 1 of 3 the other day when I notice that something smells like piss. Imagine that. A piss smell at a urinal. But this wasn't your normal bounced off a urinal cake type of piss smell. This was an old world, dehydrated, asparagus, dick rot type of smell. Like someone drank piss and then pissed it out again. And then let it sit there for a week and pissed on it some more.
I looked down (and around my massive member) and noticed that the tile grout had an acid wash look to it. Either that section of the floor is not being mopped regularly enough, or someone has a serious case of post-urinal drip. Something on the order of a pint a day. Well, fuck that. I'm guessing sniffing another man's urine can't be too healthy or there'd be a Hollywood diet built around the concept. I have now resolved to take the urinal less traveled and am going to pass water at the furthest urinal away–the handicapped urinal. As an added bonus (because it is set lower than the other urinals) I feel a full foot taller this way. It's like I'm Shaq, driving to the hole and laying some dunk-fu on some poor bastard right before I siphon the python all over a trough lolly in my new favorite urinal–number 3.
October 25th, 2006 at 7:09 pm
[...] I head into the restroom today and see that one of the maintenance guys is occupying the only urinal. I've already written about the issue of excessive splash on the floor around the urinal, so I won't re-iterate it here. Anyway, I head to the stall and hear the flush of a urinal followed by the distinct absence of any hand washing noises. Now, I see the maintenance crew routinely wearing rubber gloves and cleaning the bathrooms. My question is, is this a case where he really only needs to be concerned about washing his hands before he urinates, working under the assumption he's only going to get them dirty again? [...]